Lackluster Lox

How can it be that in a major port city that prides itself increasingly on being forward-thinking and gastronomically advanced, I can't find a goddamn piece of lox or nova that was fresh and sliced before my eyes (I'll get to the local bagels some other time)? Seafood restaurants abound, the ocean is literally right there...it's clearly not a location issue. They're already catching the salmon. Would it kill them to take a few out of the tons of salmon they bring in, smoke them up, and deliver them whole to one of the many Jewish delis in the area? I said a couple of salmon because I could count the number of Jewish delis in Boston on one hand.

One of the best parts of going to the bagel store when I was growing up was watching them take out the huge plate that proudly displayed the whole fish in all it's salty glory, and then gazing on as they prepared the feast. Every stroke of the knife was a daring exercise in hand control that brought me closer to putting the succulent slices of the sea into my salivating mouth. Or you could just rip open a vacuum-sealed pack and slap the over-preserved, rubbery, something's-not-quite-right-here chunks of smoked salmon onto your small, bland bagel. That's cool too.

It absolutely amazes me that everyone in the state puts up with this lackluster lox in a sea of fresh salmon. I don’t care what religion you are. If that religion lets you eat lox on a well done everything bagel with Philadelphia cream cheese, red onion, and a thin slice of tomato, you should try it, and you should like it. I guess it’s just what you get used to if you’re from here. I wonder if I grew up in Boston if I’d know that something was a bit off with my bagel and lox. Man, that’s some deep stuff.

Is it really that there aren’t enough Jews, ex-New-York-area residents, or Jewish ex-New-York-area residents to cause the Boston lox industry to grow ? Cause I can work on that. But I get the feeling that even if there were to be an influx of Manhattanites of the Hebrew persuasion, things would still be slow to change. Like pretty much everything that goes on in this state.

Alright, enough Boston bashing for me for one night. There will be plenty of time for that. But seriously man, get some fresh f*ing lox. You’re a real city.